Relationship Reflection

Relationship's are vital for me as a mother, wife, daughter, teacher, and friend. I have found that my friends become my family. I grew up in rural Oklahoma and married my high school sweetheart. I went to college for two years and then my husband and I got pregnant with our first son. My husband joined the Navy and we have been moving ever since. We literally moved every three years, so family was usually not close by. I am so grateful that I am a very outgoing person and make friends very easily. I passed this very much needed trait onto my children. Establishing these friendship relationships is essential when you have to move all the time and you can't rely on family to be there or to help out when issues arise.

My family is very important to me and I know that the relationships that I have with my parents and with my sisters is what made me into the outgoing, independent, strong willed, and strong minded women that I am. I believe the independence that my parents instilled in me is what gave me the confidence and outgoing personality that is much needed when you are a military spouse. I have spent almost half of the 18 years of my marriage without my husband but with my children. My husband has been on 7 deployments which lasted from 6 months to 12 months. It is a challenging life style that takes a strong commitment and dedication from both parties. The relationship that my husband and I have with each other is what has given me the courage and motivation to go back to school. I completed by associates and bachelors in the last three years and I never even touched foot on the campus. I graduated from the University of Cincinnati with my bachelors in Early Childhood Education last June and I worked full-time. I have three children that seem to be in every extracurricular activitiy there is in school and in the community. The friendships that I have made in all the states we have lived in is what is so unique about our military life. I have friends all over the world, and they have all become part of my family at one time or another. I feel that we all have friends, but for me those friends are like sisters, brothers, aunts, and even part time mothers. When you aren't able to go over and get a hug from your mother after a bad day or get to see your parents on Christmas morning it can take a toll on your emotions and feelings. I have a strong foundation with my parnets and I love yahoo messenger, texting, and emails. But it is never the same as face to face connection. That relationship with my parents and siblings is strong, it has to be when you don't get to see them for years at a time. I feel that strong foundation that my family instilled in me gave me the courage and will power to believe in myself and in my own opinions and thoughts. The characteristics from my positive relationship with my parents and with my husband is what has enabled me to form partnersihps with co-workers and other military spouses. Those characteristics that my parents instilled in me I have tried to instill in my own children. I want them to know and understand how important friendships are. I want them to have a strong foundation for who they are and know that as their parent I will always be there to support and guide. Relationships set the foundation for who we are. Think about what it would be like to move 2,000 miles away with a newborn baby and your husband had to go back to the ship that was in another state, 600 miles away. That was me at the age of 20, we moved to Washington state and my husband had to go back to California. I was left with a new baby, no job, no friends, and lived so far away from my parents. I relied on my outgoing relationship skills to pick myself up and become the woman that I am today. I feel that the foundation my parents set for me is how I was able to endure the military lifestyle. I now work for military families and I know how hard that life can be. I work hard to build partnerships and relationships with the families in my classroom. I know and understand how hard the military life can be and how tramatic those deployments are on children. I try to make that connection with my families and with the children to help instill some positive relationship building skills my parents set in me. I want to help set that foundation in the children that come trough my classroom. I want to help them learn to be independent, problem solve on their own, and learn how to be kind to others. Valuable skills that will help them be successful in life.